Almost at the End of Our Trip

I am kind of sad that our trip is winding down now. We have really had a good vacation. I never thought that we would come home and treat it like a vacation but this time we did. We did actual tourist-y things that we would never have done before, when we lived here. We only have today and tomorrow left of actually being here and then we travel on Saturday. I am really going to miss being "on vacation." When you are a Navy family living on E3 pay, vacations aren't something to be taken for granted.

The only regret I have about this trip is that I really didn't get to spend too much time with my mom. Since we stayed with my grandma and my in-laws, I didn't even see her every day and some days I only saw her for a few minutes. It kind of sucks because I love my mom, but it is her attitude and behavior that set this up the way it is. It's her issues at home and with her husband that are the cause. So really, what else could I have done? I called her. I text messaged her. I asked her to do things. We initially asked to stay with her. There has to be some middle ground and I do feel like I put forth my best effort. We managed to both see and spend time with everyone that we wanted to see when we were planning our trip. No one has been forgotten and that's pretty good. Usually the last two days of one of our visits rolls around and we are saying, "Darn! We totally forgot about so and so." There will be none of that this time. We had a good two weeks.

The best news of it all is that the detachment my husband was supposed to be sent on was moved up. The people are all leaving on Saturday rather than Sunday, so that means he can't go. He called the other day to check on everything and make sure he had all of the information (trust me, he didn't make this call willingly) and when they found out we didn't return until Saturday afternoon they said that he wouldn't be going. I know it's part of his job and eventually he will have to go on these things, but who can blame me for being super relieved that he doesn't have to go on one the day after we come back from a trip. Not to mention, he is on orders to be here right now. It isn't like he is coming back from leave.

Unfortunately, I didn't manage to lose any weight while on this trip. The good news is that I didn't gain any either. The other good news is that I actually miss working out. I should be able to get right back into the swing of working out and counting points when we get back. I am considering going to Weight Watchers meetings when we return as opposed to just using the online function. I am pretty self conscious and as a result of my depression I am a real homebody, so I think that would be a pretty big step for me. I need to check on the cost though. We can't afford for me to spend any more than I already am on Weight Watchers.

I was going to continue going to the gym with a friend when we return, however I recently gained some knowledge that lead me to change my mind. I was speaking with a couple of friends here in my hometown. Both of these people are incredibly knowledgeable when it comes to fitness and health and weight loss. I was telling them about how when we go to the gym, we just go to the family room and get on the elliptical. They both told me that doing cardio like that is not a good way to go about it. They said that it becomes counterproductive after a while and that if I want to lose weight, tone, and keep it off that I need to do about 20 minutes of cardio and after that I need to be lifting weights. Since I know that these people know infinitely more than I do and I know that one of them struggled with weight her whole life until recently when she educated herself, I believe them.

I am currently weighing my options and devising a plan for a new routine. I think that my husband and I are going to go to the gym together when he gets off of work. He can spend the time doing cardio in the family room while I lift, and then vice versa. I certainly want to lose the weight. I don't want my hard work to be counterproductive. I also could try and do something at home. It really depends on what I think will be the most effective. I would like to try the 30 Day Challenge on my Wii Active and see if that's a good workout. I would also like to try the 30 Day Shred DVDs. I know that both combine lifting and cardio and could be done without worrying about child care, from the comfort of my home. However, like I stated, I am going to choose whichever course will give me the best results from my workout. I would hate to work my butt off (pun intended) on the elliptical, only to find out that I am kind of wasting my time.

I also have my doctor's appointment and my appointment for therapy to look forward to once we get back. I actually made a list of things to discuss with the M.D. so that I go in locked and loaded and get all of my issues addressed. I have child care taken care of for my therapy session and I am immensely excited about it. I also need to call school and start getting my financial aid stuff squared away so that I can take classes this fall. I need to see an advisor and make my schedule. I recently decided that although I really want to finish, I really want to enjoy school. Therefore, I will only be taking two classes per quarter. It will take me longer, but I think I will get more quality out of the time I spend in school.

I have a lot of positivity to look forward to once we finish this trip. I have been active while we were here. I haven't spent my days shut up in the house, napping, or being a bum. I have actually gotten dressed every single day that we have been here. I go weeks without changing into real clothes, usually. I have actually felt like a functioning member of the world these last two weeks. I just need to keep this up. I need to maintain my stride. I need to find something to do every day, even if it is just walking to the playground in our complex. I feel like I should return to our house chanting, "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can." I think I can keep this up, I know I can keep this up. I have really been victorious over my depression this last 2 weeks. I need to keep myself on this level. This could be the turning point. I want this to be where things start going uphill.